TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Luke and Andrew are both tempted by a new phone that's being hyped at the CES tech show and that has them reminiscing about their Blackberries of old. Luke also went back to his own reporting from 2004 to fact check himself, and he didn't like the results.

Luke watched a movie yesterday, but he couldn't get Andrew's voice out of his head the whole time. Andrew discovers that he perfectly fits into a weirdo's theory regarding latitudes and lifestyles. And they discuss Andrew's gambling prep for his upcoming trip to Vegas.

Luke and Andrew both saw Marty Supreme over the holidays. They share their  feelings on the movie and how it fits into the current movie theater moment. They also talk about how the greatest dart players in the world have to deal with wasps during their tournaments.

Luke is concerned that he accidentally bought a legit gun on TikTok. Now he's waiting to see what shows up. Plus, a listener in Scotland explains the origins of the supposed curse of MacBeth. And Andrew had a dream about a banana, but it's not what you think. 

Luke had the most embarrassing moment he's ever had on an airplane over the holidays. He's also working on a new, exciting system for his garbage bins. And Genevieve is worried that Andrew might be having an affair with someone at the DMV. 

From scary windstorms to nostalgic smells, from dive bar popcorn to summer salad recipes, we hear from the Tens of Listeners who left us voicemail messages in 2025. Happy New Year!

Luke and Andrew kick off the new year by revisiting one of their favorite poems and the performer who made it famous. They also check-in with listener Jami, who has a list of the Top Five Low-Stake Adult Fears one might face.

Andrew is obsessed with a special table from his youth, and he's unfortunately found it for sale on eBay. He also asks for Luke's help differentiating two comedians who have little in common. And listener Ben offers a list of Top Five Experiences You Can Have In A Grocery Store.

Luke and Andrew finally speak up about the TV show Get Smart and its infamous "cone of silence." They also take a look back at some of the most interesting vocabulary words they apparently used in the past year, according to listener Kristen, who's been keeping notes. 

Hanna Brooks Olsen joins the show to talk about the Forensic Sciences Club she started in high school, why she's been staying up until 4 in the morning, and how to get someone out of bed with Sour Patch Kids. She also presents her own list of Top Five Most Satisfying Things To Clean.

Andrew is shocked and awed by some online behavior he saw yesterday…behavior that led to his own banishment on social media!

Luke and Andrew are joined by Jon, Genevieve, Susie B. and a whole bunch of Tens to celebrate the holidays! We talk about favorite holiday traditions, regifting strategies, and whether or not Genevieve and Andrew's Christmas tree is "secure." 

Luke is astounded by the small bit of wax that protects us all from absolute toilet disasters. Andrew continues to marvel at the ease of cashing checks in 2025. And listener Sarah has some 5 lists of best walks and most underrated smells.

Luke and Andrew finally do what they promised to do yesterday: Namely, talk about the best times and places to eat candy. Plus, Andrew's adventures in old-timey cinema continue!

Andrew's mind is completely blown when he discovers something about himself and Luke online. They also talk about movies that are better than the books they're based on (and one book that's better than the movie.)

Luke heard back from David Sedaris after emailing him yesterday about a detail from a recent essay. Luke and Andrew also discuss the absolutely bonkers Thursday Night Football game last night, and how Jay-Z helped the Seahawks win. And they hear from a former banker who has some intel on bad pennies. 

Luke is trying to reach David Sedaris in order to save his own sanity, but he's worried his email won't get through. He and Andrew also discuss Luke's rewatch of When Harry Met Sally and Andrew's discovery of Nick and Nora in The Thin Man. 

The wind and rain wreaked havoc at Luke's place last night, forcing him to resort to some unsightlhy measures that he's trying to come to grips with. He and Andrew also discuss the amazing travel tips doled out by AAA and public radio this morning. And they pry open the old P.O. box to find out what's waiting for them inside.

Luke leaves Andrew unsettled with a story of quasi-accidental truancy that is playing out in real time. They also discuss Luke's personal Rob Reiner Film Fest that he held last night, and Andrew remembers a couple of films that had a big impact on him as a youth. 

Luke and Andrew celebrate the life and work of Rob Reiner and his wife, Michele. They also discuss Andrew's herculean efforts to return a lost hat, and Luke's realization of what he actually looks like when watching football games. 

Luke and Andrew discuss their methods of navigating shoes-off get-togethers this holiday season. Plus, some of Luke's favorite places -- both as a child and an adult -- have announced their imminent closures. 

Luke and Andrew discuss the hot issues of the day, including USB cable management, various ways to charge ear buds, re-used ziplock bags, and what "30 percent chance of rain" really means. They also discuss why Luke is falling in love with opposing quarterback Philip Rivers, and they hear from a listener who is totally cool with Luke being on TBTL. 

The State Department is switching its official font because it thinks Calibri is too "woke". Plus, Luke's new gift from Peta comes with a revelation about the use of AI in media relations. And he and Andrew discuss the fact that a 44-year old Phillip Rivers is coming out of retirement to play in the NFL again…quite literally a dangerous game. 

Encyclopedia Luke had to figure out The Mystery Of The Ungrounded Grill in his back yard yesterday. Andrew admits to an act of betrayal on a very windy Friday night. And they discuss how the sale of Warner Brothers could hurt (or destroy?) theatrical releases. 

Luke and Andrew find themselves in a wide-ranging conversation about satellite radio, the Golden Globe podcast nominees, and whether or not Howard Stern is really holding a grudge against Ronnie The Limo Driver? Plus, Luke got a new phone and learned first-hand how companies are awkwardly avoiding the word "contract" when talking about their contracts. 

Luke made it to Seattle this morning, despite Alaska Airlines playing a very dangerous game with his schedule. Meanwhile, Andrew is insulted on behalf of Counting Crows, and listener Talia shares a story about a tense airport moment with a government official. 

TBTL Friendo and Self-Made Media Mogul Nora McInerny joins the show to talk about why she insisted on picking up Luke at the Phoenix airport when she heard he was coming to town. They also discuss Andrew's very bureaucratic plans for Christmas Eve. And they prep Luke for his upcoming appearance on KUOW's news podcast.  

Luke found himself underprepared for his underwater TV shoot in Miami this morning. Meanwhile, Andrew decides to experiment with some old audio equipment at the most inopportune time. And they discuss the season finale of their new favorite show, The Chair Company. 

A budget hotel chain is trying to hold Andrew over a barrel. Luke's preparing for his big shirt-off television moment. And together they ponder the eternal question: How long can lightly-refrigerated beef stroganoff last? 

Luke is in Miami, where he is very busy with work but would much rather be on the beach. He tells Andrew about the intense inquisition he had to pass in order to retrieve his misplaced ear buds. Meanwhile, Andrew has some Thanksgiving regrets involving his patented style of "humor."

Luke received a very exciting email from a very surprising source today. Andrew received a text message from his mobile carrier that is making him a little bit cranky. And they discuss two shows they're both watching right now -- Pluribus and The Chair Company. 

Luke and Andrew celebrate the holiday with Macy's Parade memories and a discussion of Joan Didion's elaborate Thanksgiving traditions with her highfalutin friends. 

Luke has a new toy that he is very excited to use on TBTL (and at his holiday parties.) Andrew has a sad update on his bluetooth woes. And the world's foremost unpaid Fubo spokesperson just ditched Fubo. 

Luke and Andrew announce plans for this year's TBTL Holiday Zoom Party! Plus, Luke is on an odyssey trying to get a bathroom vanity delivered. And Andrew recalls one of the most amazing (not in a good way) Lyft drivers he ever had. 

Luke and Andrew are both very happy they went out last night, even though it's so easy to stay home on a cold November Sunday. Luke really enjoyed seeing the new Noah Baumbach film, Andrew enjoyed a very special night of comedy, and they discovered the surprising origin of Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Andrew's neighborhood (and its resident pets) is on official Coyote Watch. Luke offers some solutions based on a 1990s-era awareness campaign. They also discuss the famous space crime that DIDN'T happen. And they look at the 21 million year old history of the first kiss. 

Photo of prairie dogs kissing via Amaury Laporte

Andrew talks in detail about his unsure entry into the world of Dungeons and Dragons. A story about the use of A.I. in documentaries has Luke very concerned. And a favorite TBTL song scats its way back onto the show. 

A conversation about window coverings prompts Luke to examine his unusual behavior in hotel rooms. Meanwhile, Bingo the Cat gives Andrew QUITE the scare during today's show! 

Luke's D.C. adventures continue with a jog past a partially demolished White House and a brief encounter with the Secret Service. Andrew has a beef with his cat, Bingo. And they discuss Target's new "smiling" policy for their employees and a lawsuit over tequila. 

Luke re-watched a movie on an airplane this weekend and is bowled over at how prescient the film was. Meanwhile, Andrew saw Begonia and is putting together a unified theory of films in 2025. Plus, Andrew is blown away by a cable network's "panel of experts." And Russell Wilson announces his new Cameo business.

Luke and Andrew learn the curious background of an actor in a scene that Andrew is obsessed with. They also discuss the death of the penny, some major vandalism at a beloved amusement park, and the misguided dos-and-don'ts of a community radio station.  

Luke was scheduled to appear on a local TV station in Portland this morning, but he ran into some trouble on the way. Meanwhile, Andrew went full Tim Robinson as he tried to get answers from a possibly shady business. Speaking of television, they also discuss The Chair Company and Pluribus, two shows that they're both watching right now. 

Andrew is back to talk about rival podcasts, paper towels, and Slim Goodbody. Luke is in love with a vintage video about Dulles Airport and its famous people movers. And we hear another story about found money from listener Evan. 

Jeff Hiller from "Somebody Somewhere" sits down with Luke to discuss growing up Christian, navigating quasi-celebrity, and what it would take to get him back into podcasting.

Andrew is out of office, so Luke & Jon hold down the fort as they discuss a variety of topics as Luke keeps his cool after his mom, Susie B., momentarily interrupted him doing the intro. 

Luke confesses to committing one of the biggest sins a person can commit (according to Andrew's rule book.) They also talk about the best ways to take a nap and hear David From The Basement's Top Five Ways To Watch A Movie. 

Luke and Andrew spend some time reflecting on the Seattle roots of "elevator music." And they dig into some of the Top Five lists sent in recently by listeners, including the Top Five Most Satisfying Tinkles and the Top Five Saddest Starbucks Experiences. 

Luke is in New York, where he attended his first CBS editorial meeting and received a surprising welcome from his colleagues. He and Andrew also discuss housekeeping, housekeepers, MSNBC's new branding, TBTL's new merch, the Ty-D-Bol guy, the 2000 flushes guy, and the time Andrew set his kitchen on fire. 

Luke joins the show again from New York City, where he spent the night in Sing Sing (the karaoke bar, not the prison.) He also got Roy Donked at a famous jazz club. He and Andrew discuss the disastrous decision that Colin Jost and Pete Davidson made regarding a boat, which seems very relatable for some reason. And a recent reveal about the Louvre's security password is possibly even more relatable. 

Television's Chris Hayes joins the show from his home studio, where he's also hosting Luke today. They and Andrew discuss yesterday's New York City Marathon, the New York City mayoral race, and the big mistake that led Luke on an epic journey.

Luke tries to help Andrew with a Halloween conundrum. They also try to learn more about the child on the front of an obscure cereal box. Plus, a beloved Seattle nightclub is closing some of its venues as live entertainment struggles around the country.

Andrew has been on a heck of a journey with blueberries lately. Luke can relate. They also discuss the story of a newspaper confusing Bill DeBlasio, the wine merchant, with Bill de Blasio, the former mayor of NYC.

Luke and Andrew realize (with the help of a listener) that they were missing a pretty big piece of information about a Luke Wilson commercial they talked about at length yesterday. Plus, Andrew has some questions about a plethora of radio ads he's been hearing that feature a former reality TV host. They also discuss the two oldest McDonald's burgers in existence.

Luke and Andrew consider their chances of winning the brand new (and already-controversial) Golden Globe For Podcasting. Plus, Luke got up at the crack of dawn today to find out how the tofu gets made. And Andrew is dealing with an especially painful Wordle loss. 

Something happened to Luke this weekend that has him considering a very big change in the hair department. He also learned his new favorite joke from an Uber driver. And Andrew had a moderately shocking moment in a record store. 

Luke will be hosting a Halloween pet costume party this weekend. He’s also getting more into Bluesky these days. Meanwhile, Andrew sets the record straight on a classic scene from Superman IV. 

Luke finally lifted the metal plate that covers the well in his driveway to find out what exactly is down there. He offers Andrew a full report. They also discuss a Washington Post piece about a slang phrase the youth are using -- or, were using, until the Washington Post wrote about  it. And Luke picked the absolute worst time to become a Blazers fan. 

Now that there’s no more baseball to discuss, Luke and Andrew’s conversations turn to lawn care and how gravel maintenance has Luke reconsidering his relationship with Amazon.com. They also explore more creative names for sunshowers from around the world, thanks to listener Marissa. 

The Seattle Mariners are not going to the World Series. But Luke and Andrew are doing surprisingly okay this morning. Plus, more listeners weigh-in on the “best beer experience” list, as well as situational popcorn. 

After a big win and a big loss over the weekend, the Seattle Mariners now face one game that will determine whether or not they go to the World Series for the very first time. Luke and Andrew check-in on their feelings. And Andrew explains the very non-baseball reason he’s been feeling an immense amount of anxiety lately.

Photo via Wikimedia Commons

Luke and Andrew weigh-in on a listener’s list of “Top Five Beer Situations.” Plus, Andrew has an update on Operation Dog Sitter, and they discuss the current situation the  Seattle Mariners find themselves in.

Luke and Andrew discuss the “social saunas” that a company is promoting in Seattle, as well as a disturbing sweat-related habit that Andrew once had. They also share their feelings about yesterday’s blowout loss by the Mariners, which probably isn’t as bad as it seems. (But don’t say that out loud, because you might jinx it.) 

Andrew watched a remarkable episode of Columbo yesterday while dog sitting and concluded that Peter Falk is a bit of a dog himself. Meanwhile, Luke was checking out some slightly more modern HBO productions, like The Chair Company and The Alabama Solution and shares his thoughts. They also discuss a new AI app that is churning out impressive but concerning content and a stolen gas station dinosaur who found its way back home. 

Luke and Andrew set the record straight on a bear-related TBTL mishap. They also review some of the things they’re doing to bring good luck to the Mariners and some of the things they’re doing to avoid a jinx. 

Andrew heard “the most surprising radio commercial to air during a football game” yesterday, and he tries to get Luke to guess what it was. They also, of COURSE, talk a little baseball after their beloved Mariners’ historic weekend.

It’s family day on TBTL!  Luke’s brother, David From The Basement, joins the show to talk about serving the Mariner’s manager at a Seattle restaurant last night, on the eve of the biggest Ms game in decades. Then Luke’s mom, Susie B., pops in to answer your questions!

Luke missed most of the Mariners game yesterday; Andrew wasn’t so lucky. They also discuss a questionable TV commercial that seems to encourage human/buffalo romance and Luke’s childhood memories of running free through grocery stores and the neighborhood at large. 

(Photo via u/Hothacon on Reddit)

Andrew had a complete freakout yesterday over a text he sent Luke. Meanwhile, Luke has been editing and re-editing his Yelp Review Of A Lifetime. And Andrew’s neighbor sent a carefully crafted note to the neighborhood email chain that he thinks he appreciates.

Luke is confused over the decision by the now-famous “Crying Mariners Fan” to wear a Savannah Bananas hat at an M’s playoff game. He and Andrew also discuss an A.I.-generated song that has both of them feeling uneasy and a Seattle Times Rant & Rave column for the ages.  

Andrew and Luke wonder if they can emotionally and physically handle the Mariners’ playoff run. (Turns out they can, so long as a cute baby is involved.) They also discuss Luke’s potentially magical visit to the doctor and Andrew’s general grumpiness. 

Andrew made a terrible discovery last night that is putting a huge damper on his plans to watch the Mariners’ playoff games. And Luke is once again offering unwanted feedback to his local newspaper, this time in the comments section.

Luke is going on a huge organizing bender, and even he wonders if it’s gone too far. He and Andrew also discuss public radio production rules, hearts of palm, and politically-coded outdoor furniture. 

Luke just composed “the Yelp review of a lifetime!” after some shady shenanigans by the world’s grumpiest HVAC company. He and Andrew also discuss One Battle After Another in detail now that they’ve both seen it. (They save the movie talk for the very end of the show, with plenty of warnings for listeners who want to avoid spoilers. Movie talk begins about one hour and twenty minutes into the podcast.) 

Andrew narrowly avoided getting into a fight in a barroom bathroom this weekend. Luke somehow slipped into a wormhole and lost a chunk of time in the Portland airport. And a listener’s dog learns to play the blues. 

Photo Credit: Eflon on Flickr

Luke checks-in from the Twin Cities, where he’s going to farmers markets, alarming restaurant patrons, and writing strongly-worded letters to the editor.

Andrew and Genevieve’s upcoming dog sitting adventure just got a bit more complicated. Genevieve joins the show to explain why and to discuss her burgeoning eBay side-hustle. And Luke checks-in from a hotel room somewhere, naked.  

Luke had an epic morning dealing with the world’s #1 grump. And, surprisingly, it’s not Andrew. 

Luke and Andrew discuss the pros-and-cons of optimism as it relates to both the Mariners, who had a historic win last night, and Jimmy Kimmel, who returned to the airwaves after his controversial and misguided suspension. 

Luke and Andrew discuss their respective journeys looking for the perfect bathroom cups. They also discuss Jimmy Kimmel's return to the (some) airwaves tonight, and Luke’s new theory about the FCC. 

Andrew is back after a long week away. He and Luke catch up on the most scintillating aspects of TBTL production, an amazing sports weekend for Seattle fans, and the saddest sign you can see on the door of a hotel conference room. 

David from the basement stops by to defend the honor of the Fall Season, while Luke frets about an upcoming boat adventure.

TBTL Producer Emeritus Jen Andrews stops by to talk weighted vests, EMMY bits, and tinned fish lunatics.

Luke is distracted by some very cute wildlife outside the Madrona Hill studio, while bestie Phyllis Fletcher pops in to discuss old Seattle and new Howard Stern.

Broadcast Barry stops by to share secrets of his business success, including buying sandwiches for Very Angry Garbage Collectors.

Luke catches Jon Sklaroff up on his weekend golf outing, while Jon catches Luke and listeners up on the progress he’s making on the TBTL-A-THON thank you gifts.

Luke has some Big Weekend Plans™ that involve golfing, hosting, and home improvementing. But is he ready? Andrew, meanwhile, had a very long night at the ballpark yesterday and isn’t sure if he’ll make it through today’s episode. 

A story about A.I. generated podcasts has Luke legitimately worried about the future…and his livelihood. He’s also got some very bad news for Andrew regarding sasquatch. 

Luke enjoyed an impromptu history lesson about his neighborhood from his 82 year old neighbor, Gay. Andrew is in a fight with a restaurant over something he’s completely imagined. And a closer look at TSA precheck leads to a conversation about waiting in line at DMVs and passport offices. 

Luke makes a wonderful discovery about his neighborhood, thanks to his dog-sitting responsibilities. He also tells Andrew about a cringy moment on the Howard Stern Show that they can both learn from. And a listener calls-in with another (very interesting!) correction to a previous discussion about Warwick Davis. 

Luke is dogsitting this week, and his dogological clock is spinning out of control. Andrew also has a doggy-date on the horizon that he’s a little nervous about. They also discuss the Phillies fan who essentially took a baseball away from a child in the stands. 

Luke has decided to make a big change in his life regarding his drinking -- specifically, his drinking of sparkling water! It also appears that his stress dreams are coming to life in a literal way. 

After Andrew’s failure to help Luke with his stand-up routine, Luke turns to A.I. for some jokes. Plus, Morrissey is ready to sell his stake in the songs he wrote for The Smiths, and you know he’s serious because he set-up a gmail account and posted it on Instagram. 

Andrew has learned how to properly pronounce the word “pestilence.” Unfortunately, it’s because he’s dealing with it right now. Meanwhile, Luke is shocked by the list of careers he can choose from while applying for a new credit card. 

Andrew tries and fails to help Luke with his stand-up routine. Luke made the questionable decision to watch Sexy Beast with his dad. Andrew made the right decision to overcome his fears and watch Weapons at the theater. 

A short conversation about Andrew’s fantasy draft turns into a long conversation about the cruelty of late-stage capitalism. In other  words, a perfect Labor Day show! Luke and Andrew also discuss Twisted Tea, Hawaiian vacations, and some Labor Day “fun facts.”

Andrew had a dream involving a public toilet. A very public toilet. Plus, Luke is learning about the birds and the bees -- specifically, the humming birds and the yellow jackets that are harassing them in his back yard. And they take some time to revisit the 1990s show Dinosaurs.

A book written by a TBTL Ten just ended up on Barack Obama’s summer reading list, and Luke and Andrew are doing their best to draft off that fame. Andrew also offers a dramatic reading of Clan of the Cave Bear, which was oddly *not* on Obama’s reading list.  

Luke and Andrew discuss their blood pressure levels in an attempt to court younger listeners. Plus, Luke had a magical moment in his garden, Burning Man gets burnt, and Listener Joey heeds the call for a new TBTL country western song. 

Luke’s mom, Susie B., joins the show to share her thoughts on the Vedder Cup, timeshare negotiating, and sneaking into movie theaters. Luke also was shocked at the assembly required for a new piece of furniture in his studio. 

Luke introduces a brand new segment called “Please Stop”. It involves his experiences with FUBO TV and Counting Crows. Meanwhile, Andrew has a varmint problem, but it’s not as bad as his “Vedder Cup” problem.