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'Twas the week before Christmas, when all through our house

Not a creature was stirring, not even that big mouth

Our stockings were hung by the chimney with care

In hopes that the MPD would stay in the Square

The renters were nestled all snug in their beds

While visions of alchy bums danced in their heads

And mummy in her Star Market smock and I in my head spin hat

Had just settled our brains for a long...

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It’s Thanksgiving, and we're carving up some Planes, Trains and Automobiles, and it’s not just as a holiday classic, but as a masterclass in comedic discomfort delivered by two legends at the peak of their powers: Steve Martin and John Candy. Martin is a symphony of simmering fury. A brilliant performance of the slow-motion dissolution of a WASP executive’s sanity. Meanwhile, Candy's a bulldozing force of good-natured, oblivious optimism. Martin’s precise, explosive rants are only possible because of Candy’s seismic, childlike sincerity. Elevating what could have been a simple roa...

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The Monster Squad (1987) is what happens when a bunch of middle school monster nerds decide to take on Dracula, the Wolfman, and the rest of Universal’s greatest hits — armed mostly with sarcasm, bike helmets, and the power of friendship. The film was unfairly dismissed when it came out, possibly because audiences weren’t ready for a movie where a kid yells, “Wolfman’s got nards!” and somehow, it becomes cinematic poetry.

Over the years, The Monster Squad has crawled out of its coffin and earned its cult status — a true hidden gem for...

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Another pull from one of The Malden Chronicles episodes that's worth a revisit. 

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Jacob’s Ladder is part psychological horror, part spiritual breakdown, and all sweaty paranoia. Tim Robbins nails it as a Vietnam vet whose post-war life turns into a fever dream of demons, flashbacks, and truly bad subway etiquette.  It's the kind of movie that makes you question reality, mortality, and why anyone would trust a chiropractor named Louis with existential advice. 

Come for the psychological trauma, stay because you can’t tell what’s real anymore.

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People, places and things. 

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Grab your flamethrower and your blood test kit, because we’re thawing out John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982) — the frosty freakshow where Kurt Russell, Keith David, Wilford Brimley, and the gang learn the hard way that trust is dead and the dog is definitely not okay. And remember, it’s not paranoia if your best friend’s head just grew spider legs.

And that Entertainment Tonight intro music I used just happens to be from June 25, 1982. Youtube is a strange and wonderful place.

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Groovy.

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This is a special double header is brought to you hot from theater to loft. Bask in the greatness of a franchise that we're glad to see propagate through the decades. From Leslie to Liam, and Priscilla to Pam. Chef's kiss.

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July 3, 1984, 5:30 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time.

"Burt, I...I think things are gettin' outta hand!"

If that isn't the understatement of the '80s. Return Of The Living Dead is serving up more brains, just in case all that mystery meat in them hotdogs you ate on the 4th whet your appetite. James Karen, Linnea Quigley, Clu Gulager and Don Calfa bring the heat in this comedy horror. Sure, pitting punks against zombies might be a staple of the genre now, but at...

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"My name's Louden, Louden Swain. Last week I turned 18. I wasn't ready for it. I haven't done anything yet. So I made this deal with myself. This is the year I make my mark."

What to say about Vision Quest? It's a staple of any well rounded '80s film diet. Unless you're cutting weight at an unhealthy rate. And let it be known, since I don't think I quite drove it home during this episode....this is one of my all time (unlikely) favorite movies.

Matthew Modine and...

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This scientific romp was part of the ultimate trio released in August 1985. Real Genius, Weird Science, and My Science Project were released within one week of each other and just one month after Back to the Future. With Martha Coolidge at the helm, this movie spared the usual sophomoric fare we all love the '80s for. I love those sentence-ending prepositions. I ain't know much, but I know what I like. And I likes me some Val Kilmer. 

With no pandering to the usual bully/nerd tropes, this movie was r...

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Just some low key stories for posterity in this episode. Linden love and the lumps along the way.

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Once again sitting down with my brothers Jamie and Jeff. This is the caliber of story that barely makes the cut for public consumption. Anything south of this stays in the family vault of recordings. If you've listened to any of The Malden Chronicles, the background and reference as to how this kind of scenario came to be is of little concern. And how it all went away is a tale unto itself. If you find it offensive or hard to take, please forgive me.

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Here's another one from 2020 that was never going to see the light of day. It was originally over an hour. We can't put anyone through us walking through the movie minute by minute, so it's now about 25 minutes. Enjoy the silence....

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November 27, 2020: We're going back to 2020 with this episode. Well before The Movie Loft Podcast was available on any streaming platform. As I've mentioned before, we have a whole unreleased first season in the back of our vault. It may not rival the Paisley Park archives, but there are obviously some uncut gems in there. And No Retreat, No Surrender is one of them. A 1986 classic featuring JCVD 1.0. 

I was truly shocked to find this in there. Trust me when I tell you that there are some unreleasable episodes. We were feeling o...

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Here is an excerpt from The Malden Chronicle – Crime Does Pay episode. This is a slightly longer edit of the original story, so you can hear that some of what hits the cutting room floor is just as juicy.

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This is an excerpt taken from The Malden Chronicles – Tales Of The City episode. I always remembered it as a story of my brother intervening to protect a woman from her attacking boyfriend. How wrong I was....

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This is an excerpt from The Malden Chronicles – Rooms For Rent episode. 

That time a stereo of ours grew some legs and moved to a new address.

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This is an excerpt from The Malden Chronicles – Rooms For Rent episode. 

That day at the Granada Theater when the Melrose football team wanted to see what all the fuss was about with the Malden/Medford rivalry.

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This is a short excerpt from the Midnight Madness epiode. The Song Remains The Same riot at Granada Theater, Malden Square, December 1980. 

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I'm splashing out four dollars for going six minute over my plan this month....you better appreciate it. Whatever your favorite six minutes may be, imagine that is where I spent all that extra scratch, just for you. 

On Christmas night, we went to see Nosferatu in the theater for a TMLP field trip. And although Robert Eggers had us huddled together and quaking with fear afterward in the lobby, we still had something left in the tank. Enter Running Scared, a 1986 Peter Hyams epic tale starring Gregory Hines and Billy C...

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Christmas is a coming and the egg is in the nog! 

Enjoy our holiday double header of A Christmas Story and Black Christmas! Two great Bob Clark offerings that go great together. And don't forget to get over to Zayre for those last minute gifts for the grandparents. They're usually bought real close to the register itself. Am I the only one that was confused about Sears and Zayre as a child? Probably.

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Here's some holiday company brought to you from a few Maldonians, Derek, Mic and Jamie. They sit down with me to shoot the proverbial shit. It should have been more Christmas centric, and that's in there for sure. I just took my hands off the wheel too much. So the edit is light and the episode is long. Hopefully you can find your way through this TMLP visit. 

And if you are a Maldonian, maybe you got an honorable mention. We were all over the road with this one.

M...

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Here's an excerpt from and olde Malden Chronicles that needs to be highlighted this Christmas season. Enjoy Jamie's lost Christmas Eve of 1982. All the way from Malden to Littleton Massachusetts....the spirits were felt.

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This is a simple tale of entrepreneurship, from brothers Donahue. Delivered early this year, here is the 28 Spring Street holiday classic, Robin Hood Trees. You don't need to sift through our catalog to find it. And what brings you this gem before Thanksgiving has even arrived at your miserable doorstep? Well, I was behind an 18 wheeler filled to the brim with trim this morning. All that green being delivered to Christmas tree lots in my neck of the woods. The truck even turned onto my road! For shame.

Here's to doing...

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The Evil Dead is Sam Raimi's entrance into the world of proper filmmaking. And what an entrance it is. With his ragtag group of friends in tow, Sam handles this supernatural horror flick and all the demonic entities that have been conjured along with it handily. Trust us, Bruce Campbell and his boomstick make this the must-see spookablast treat of the Halloween season!

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There is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. You are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the inner mind to . . . 2015's The Witch: A New England Folktale. 

This Robert Eggers masterpiece is worth every lock of Michael J Fox's hair I harvested to get us there. Ralph Ineson, Anya Taylor-Joy, Harvey Scrimshaw and Kate Dickie made it more than worth our while. And being set in the 1630...

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Creepshow is the pinnacle of '80s horror anthology, and we're here for it. The dream team of horror came together to create this masterpiece. And that team is George Romero, Stephen King and Tom Savini.

Tell me how a cast including Leslie Nielson, Ted Danson, Hal Holbrook, Ed Harris, Adrienne Barbeau, E.G. Marshall and Fritz Weaver (among many others) somehow created a campy comic book based horror anthology for the ages. I'll wait.

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The Fog is a sleeper in John Carpenter's canon. The soundtrack is not! This 1980 movie demands your attention with a stacked cast (see what I did there) of Adrienne Barbeau, Jamie Lee Curtis, Hal Holbrook, Tom Atkins, Janet Leigh, John Houseman, and of course Tommy Lee Wallace. 

Beautifully shot and scored on a modest budget, this movie has aged like a fine wine. So many films that were critically panned have become classics over time, and John Carpenter has his share in that column. Which is a shame. I'm sure that h...

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It's casual. This Cameron Crowe flick, referred to as the spiritual sequel to Fast Times at Ridgemont High, brings together a cast on the cusp of breaking the decade of movies wide open.....right after its release. We've got Chris Penn (Footloose), Eric Stoltz (Mask), Ilan Mitchel Smith (Weird Science), Leah Thompson (Back to the Future), Randy Quaid, Rick Moranis and Jenny Wright (St. Elmo's Fire). With cameos by Leo Penn, Lee Ving, Sherilyn Fenn, Ronnie Wood, Ben Stein and Robert Ridgely! And a score by EDDIE VAN HALEN!!!!

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Round and round it goes, where it stops nobody knows. We're baaaaack. Another round of scraps from a sit-down with my brothers Jamie and Jeffrey. All that's fit for consumption. Blizzard of 1978, dirt bikes and motorcycles....we've got a little bit of everything for you in this one. Strap on your ear googles and you're ready to go!

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All we are saying is give peace a chance
All we are saying is give peace a chance

Revolution, evolution, masturbation, flagellation, regulation, integrations
Meditations, United Nations, congratulations

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Let's rumble! This Francis Ford Coppola classic demands your attention. Talk about a formative film! And with a cast of Ralph Macchio, C. Thomas Howell, Matt Dillon, Diane Lane, Emilio Estevez, Rob Lowe, Patrick Swayze, Tom Cruise...you just can't lose with The Outsiders. Stay Gold. 

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This George Lucas joint is the jam. Trust us! It's essentially Indiana Jones with a duck. Yeah, Yeah. That's the ticket. Whatever your opinion is, Leah Thompson compels you. The dark overlords possess you. And a baby Tim Robbins begs you. Don't look away. 

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This movie is the perfect all-nighter watch. NYC in the mid 80s'? Please and thank you! And much like the misadventures of Griffin Dunne in this Martin Scorsese masterpiece, After Hours, I just couldn't get this one done. It was a long and winding road that took me at least twice as long as usual. Very apropos. 

Now that it's done. Let's all relish the absolute monster cast of....Griffin Dunne, Rosanna Arquette, Linda Fiorentino, Teri Garr, Catherine O'hara, John Heard, Dick Miller, Bronson Pinchot, Cheech & Chong, Verna Bloom, Will Patton a...

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Here we are with another installment of the Malden Chronicles. Brother James and brother Jeff are proving the less than amusing local color once again. 

What to say? If you've read any summaries on older Malden episodes, you've got the lay of the land. If not, please indulge yourself. It really does provide a little more insight, which inevitably makes the listening experience more engaging. 

In the immortal word of Charlie Daniels...

But I couldn't believe it, I just had to find out for myself
And I...

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Game over, man.

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Hoosiers 1986. Gene Hackman takes us to the hoop with this classicg tale of triumph and redemption. Commanding your respect and admiration along the way....unlike that louse of a drunk that Dennis Hopper plays. Shaking and shivering like a scared little bitch below the covers. I'm so cold....waaaaaah.

It was Dentyne.

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Join us on the flat circle, for the first in a seemingly endless loop of Terminator films. One and done. We're giving you the best of the lot. Best of the decade. Best of the genre. 

This is (unarguably) James Cameron's best film, thanks in large part to his brilliant (re)casting of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Linda Hamilton, Michael Biehn, Earl Been, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton and Paul Winfield round out this inspired cast. Never forget Dick Miller, no matter how small his part may be.

Bess Motta Forever..... 

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Here we are again with another episode of The Malden Chronicles….Crime Does Pay. A few more unearthed stories from my older brothers Jamie and Jeffrey. Cue the Benny Hill music.

Lean and mean. As usual, this sit-down has been trimmed down to 45 minutes from well over two hours. Dressed up in its best court suit and ready for public presentation. You’ll have to trust the fact that a lot of the other stuff has to remain in the family breast pocket. I couldn’t possibly edit some of the tales...

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Merry New Year!

Trading Places, 1983. Eddie Murphy, Dan Ackroyd, Jamie Lee Curtis, Paul Gleason, Don Ameche, Ralph Bellamy, Denholm Elliot, Jim Belushi, Frank Oz, Giancarlo Esposito, Al Franken, Tom Davis.....You're welcome.

“Those men wanted to have sex with me!”

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Here's a compilation of our past TMLP Christmas stories that's sure to give any Time-Life or K-tel Christmas collection a run for the money. Enjoy!

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John Candy, John Hughes and Macaulay Culkin. What more do you want from 1989?! Uncle Buck closes out the decade with attitude and heart. Soothe your Thanksgiving hangover with our melodious voices, lulling you into a false sense of security. Until you find yourself wondering if your crazy, out-of-work, bum uncle will shave your head while you sleep. 

Just click play already! We’ve done the battle of the wills. The deck’s stacked in our favor. You’re just gonna lose again.

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"The years hadn't softened Moronie. He continued to murder the English language, and anyone who got in his way. " 

1982 may be The Year of Living Dangerously, but 1984 is most definitely the year of living Johnny Dangerously! This movie inhabits a special place in the realms of comedy, parody classics of the '80s. And the creative license taken on curse words has lived a quiet life of infamy in small groups of immature males for the last 39 years. 

Here's a roll call of how deep the cast ru...

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Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! 

If you repeat the word apathetic three times, plan on a late night pep talk from your three favorite hosts. One that will likely keep you from ever uttering that word again. 

Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder, Tim Burton, Danny Elfman and the year 1988. What more do you want?! This movie leaves one wanting for nothing on every level. If you happen to disagree, Robert Goulet will chum the waters of the bayou with your unappreciative ass. 

Sit back and grab a KitKat, some Reece's Pie...

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 It's October and there's a lot of nefarious things going on over at Mayfield Place. The Klopek's have moved next door, and to say they're anything less than completely sus is a vast understatement. The paranoia sweeps though the cul-de-sac goes like witching rumors through Salem Village. 

This is the Tom Hanks that we all came to know and love during his formative filmography years. This movie also gives us classic Corey Feldman in one of his more enjoyable later teen roles, and Bruce Dern in a role that is very at...

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A latch key and a Happy Meal. I only ever had the scratch for a single cheeseburger though. Why are Gen Xers aging in a very different way than most of our ancestors?

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If you've ever dreamt of being so good at a video game that it leads to your recruitment to defend the Frontier against Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada. Then get in loser! We're going back to 1984 to The Last Starfighter. Luke Skywalker....er....Alex Rogan has been playing Star Wars....er....Starfighter at the farm....er....trailer park for longer than I care to remember. Literally. 

The Last Starfighter is one of the earliest adopters of cgi in supporting a hefty part of a films aesthetic. And although it's glaringly obvious, t...

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This is pulled from an episode that will never see the light of day. There was an on-air fistfight etc. I won't bore you with the details, but it is a nice story to warm you up for the impending onslaught of anachronistic holiday stimuli.  

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Dogma, hearsay and the like.

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If you consider California penal code sections 484207,  A597, and 217, theft, kidnapping, cruelty to animals and attempted murder something to laugh about, then you agree that Dragnet is a 1987 crown jewel of comedy. Tom Hanks before TOM HANKS is always a celluloid treasure to behold.

P.A.G.A.N. People Against Goodness And Normalcy. Now I'm not saying that I subscribe to this acronym, but I'm not saying I don't either. Dan Akroyd and Tom Hanks team up in this buddy cop comedy. The stacked cast also gifts us with Christopher P...

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Just a few of the movies we feel compelled to watch during the dog days of summer. 

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It's late August and time to visit your thieving labor day savior, Bernie. I'm a late comer to this punchline classic, but I'll be making it an annual destination in my end of summer movie rotation. I need to make up for lost time and atone for willfully avoiding this movie all these years. 

The irony in Terry Kiser being lauded for his mastery of physical comedy while playing a dead man is not lost on me. Neither is Andrew McCarthy seamlessly playing against type while Jonathon Silverman turns in a w...

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We're all wasted! Not really. Come to think of it, they didn't even end up using that song in the movie. They didn't use Light Up The Sky by Van Halen either. We can't help but wonder where or how the director would have deployed them. Using Cheap Trick, The Cars, Van Halen (You Really Got Me), and The Ramones tells us he knew what he was doing in these realms.

What can I say? The concern with property resale values colliding with the fallout of the social discontent of adolescence...

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Totally awesome video games! That's what Joysticks promises. Eugene, McDorfus and King Vidiot are running interference while we chew up the scenery of this 1983 T&A buffet. 

This movie has everything you do AND don't want you in your early 80s celluloid war chest. Scott McGinnis and Corrine Bohrer round out the casting staples of any great, but forgettable 80s flick. Joe Don Baker must have been blackmailed to be in this movie. Come to think of it, he was blackmailed IN this movie as well. Art imitating life...imitating art?  Duration: 01:01:37

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These bits fell out of my back pocket when I got up from piecing together the Tales of the City episode on Malden, MA. Enjoy!

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Just Thom, Jeff and Jamie at the octagonal parquet table tonight. And here we are with another entry in the annals of life at 28 Spring Street in Malden, MA. Our matriarchal leader is jettisoning the riff-raff like a lost installment in the Death Wish franchise. First mission was to reclaim the nights for sleeping. 

All five of us kids were reunited throughout the summer of 1980 in that house. Jamie and Justine were unceremoniously thrown out of dads house, so they were there from day one. Tommy and Tracy were taken for w...

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Let's do some sweet ass sliding through this BMX classic called RAD. A 1986 right of passage for those who had the passion for all things wheels. Once you retired those primitive four-wheeled strap-ons, it was time to go wheels up on a skateboard or BMX bike. 

In the off chance that you still had all your own teeth, you were probably allowed to experience all 3 of these cultural phenomenons at close range. If not, stand back and pump up the riders cru-ising by. 

We have a young Lori Laughlin im...

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Meet is at Bronson Canyon Halfpipe. 9:00. Joust. Be there. No, YOU be there! You shut up, you little punk. It's time to get down with Corey and Tommy, and some boxing gloves on a chain. We're talking Daggers and The Ramp Locals. And don't let Tommy catch Chrissy with any Val jerks!

"That wild Indian picture happens to be stylin', you don't know what you're talkin' about."

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All of a sudden....Malden, MA.

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Another chapter in the Malden Chronicles is in! This time around it's just Thom with his brothers Jeff and Jamie (Jim to the unrelated) taking it out and cutting it up. These 28 Spring Street stories will now live in the annals of infamy for generations to come.

Now here's a little story I've got to tell, about one bad Barbara you know so well. It started way back in history, in a rooming house upon Spring Street. Malden, MA.

Here we are again with another Malden Chronicles periodical. We...

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Get in! I'll explain on the way.  

Used Cars was one in an endless loop of early '80s movies watching over us as we plopped ourselves down in front of the cathode-ray tube babysitter. And we flew in an expert for this episode. Jesus Mike is your man if you're in the market for a new beater. He's one suave....shut your mouth! 

This movie was a right of passage on The Movie Channel in 1981. TMC was our first VCR. Play it again Sam! 

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Here we take a glancing blow at identifying some of the best albums of the 1980s....in our humble opinion of course. We're not deep diving, so don't judge, we've already handled that. 

Gotta say that I personally think that Duran Duran's first album should be included. However, the inclusion of Is There Something I Should Know on the reissue we got here in the states when Rio took off is simply too jarring. I always thought The Chauffeur would  have fit nicely on it  🤔

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It's Just Begun....that song should have been used in the Roxy battle scene according to the Beat Street dancers. As one of the all time great breakdance tracks, it would have been epic. Hollywood always wants to have its own way though, and Arthur Baker's Breakers Revenge became iconic despite that overruling. That factoid is one of many that I forgot to offload during this episode. I was delirious about doing Beat Street for weeks and still couldn't get it right. Kool Moe Dee making his first appearance on film in the...

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This ain't no trip to Lapland, and it's not your moms plum pudding. And it's most certainly not a hallucination brought on by Russian vodka poisoned by Chernobyl! What it is, is a Yuletide celebration to rival any stocking stuffer you're sure receive. 

Let us never forget the sentiments of Frank Cross at this time of year. The most magical moment for humanity. Yule love it!

It's Christmas time in Hollis Queens, mom's cooking chicken.....oops, wrong miracle monologue. 

It's Christmas Eve! It's the one night of th...

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Late night maneuvers and hot pursuit. What more do you need from the vault of Tony Times?

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On our podcast there's an "ah" every 11 seconds, an errant "umm" every 25 seconds, a mispronounced word every 65 seconds, a serious case of copyright infringement every 24 minutes, and 250 cases of us focusing on ourselves instead of our listeners in every episode.

We're downing Cella Chocolate Covered Cherries (the four c's that sweeten every Christmas) and clowning on Stallone's Dirty Harry wannabe startin' somethin' attempt at another franchise. Sufferin' succotash! It just wasn't in the cards for ole Sylvester with this one.

So if you want to be a maverick renegade...

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Happy Thanksgiving! Let's give thanks for the Keaton and the Garr. That's all I got for ya tonight folks. In the true spirit of gender blending, I have to bake cookies. They don't bake themselves you know!

Some Malden Chronicles dropouts straight from Mr. Berger's class.

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rough-and-ready adjective (rə-fən-ˈre-dē): crude in nature, method, or manner but effective in action or use.

Yep, that’s the ticket. We have another Malden Chronicles sit-down in the books. This sit-down with Thom's brother Jeff, and once again, Mic, also includes our old friend Phil from the block. There's some stunning details shared about residency at Mcleans Hospital in the late 70s.  And our youth detention services (can you say DYS?) in general at the time. Let us give thanks that it was a different time and pla...

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We got sideways and sugar spiraled on Saturday night. Enjoy this Fright Night pillowcase of mysteries. I admittedly did not take stock and edit it into neat piles for you. Let's dump it on the floor together and marvel at the assortment. Happy Halloween!

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First cars and some roadworthy memories.

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Get in buddy! We’re talking about a beautifully tragic tale. A story so improbably perfect for all of us self-avowed cretins. It was born evil and has possessed every youth who’s watched it since. How about we all agree Christine is about as magnificent a movie as you’ll ever experience in October. Just ask Phil!

What else can I say? No shitter ever came between me and this movie. If they did, watch out.

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Redacted material follows.....

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Disclaimer: 
I (admittedly) don’t know about you, but I do know what this movie symbolized to me as an adolescent. It’s the dream that the seeds of who you believe, or imagine yourself to be, can be seen by others. And that you can end up living your (day)dream at the end of the day. Someday. With that boy or girl you've pined for. Quite simple. Even as an adult, being fully capable of digesting the subtext….I stand by that. 

Now let's get weird with this outlier...

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We’re talking top ten fast food fads of the 80s in this minisode. From the faux health-conscious Lean Cuisiners, to the footless big gulpers. And a spirited discussion about north shore beefs almost comes to blows. 

Let’s get dead.

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We’re mailing it in with this one, flunking out in true Summer School fashion. No excuses, no doctors notes. I'm sure we're leaving a lot of stones unturned, so if you’re hoping for a deep dive on this movie…..we’ll be in the shallow end waiting for you.

We’ve relied on our winning personalities more than once. Excelling in gaining confidences with words and destroying them with inaction is our currency. All while making you feel like we’ve somehow done you a solid. You’re welcome.

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Join us for a couple of Top Ten lists from the 80s. Spoiler, the African ant eater ritual dance is not on them.

Yes, I know it's Polaner All Fruit, not Polymer Real Fruit. Sometimes we get swept up in the frenzy. Can ya blame us?!

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Turkey Point is open for business! And King Cry-baby is headlining this raucous romp of rampant juvenile delinquency. 

John Waters has outdone himself with this divine time capsule of cinema for all you ne’er do wells to laze upon. Don’t be a square, revel in all its grease and glory…..because, sometimes shook-up old ladies get cut. 

Yes, I know it's Alannah Myles, and not Keys.

Turkey Point is open for business! And King Cry-baby is headlining this raucous romp of rampant juvenile delinquency. 

John Waters has outdone himself in creating a divine time capsule of cinema for all you ne’er do wells to laze upon. Don’t be a square, drape yourself in all its grease and glory…..because, sometimes shook-up old ladies get cut. 

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“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.”  ― Michael J. Fox

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In this sit-down with Thom's brother Jeff with friends Mic and Phil, we're hearing about some of Malden's old hangouts, haunts, and hostile environments. All that along with documenting our families storied past. What a bargain! Even Sparks can't comete with this deal.

This episode veers away from our conventional movie content. I’ve always planned to make periodical releases about growing up in Malden during the 80s. And if you think I’m starting a whole other podcast just to do it, blow it out your ass. 

In short...

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I don't think I could do this episode any more justice than the title itself. See what I did there? Well, didjya?

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Greetings and salutations from Sherwood Ohio! We're talking about the 1989 killer classic and nihilistic wit fest known as Heathers in this episode. This atypical suburban American satire is easily the most quotable movie of the decade. A black comedy that forever changed the teen movie genre and aptly prepared us for the years of apathy that enveloped every undiagnosed misanthrope Prozac nation had to offer. 

Surely we are past all that now, right? We've learned that real life sucks losers dry. So what are you waiting for? Get motoring over to y...

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Minimum work, minimum wage, maximum rage.

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We're baaaack! Winter break is OVER.

One thing leads to another in this epochal mid 80s maze. Madonna in her prime, Rosanna Arquette in hot pursuit, Aidan Quinn showing us that supporting roles do not have to appear as such. And you can dance! For inspiration! 

I mean, we're talking cola war conspiracy theories, 3 identical strangers, the Commodore 64 and personal ads! If you don't act now, you will be forever trailing us in a parallel universe.

This is a movie made by women, about women, at a t...

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We don't like you. You're voted ON the island.....the desert island. We do like you enough to let you bring some movies to finish out your miserable existence with, while we party like we're desperately seeking 1999. Here are some of our "your life is on fire, what do you grab" movie choices.

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The egg is in the nog, and the 1970 Albert Finney version of Scrooge is on deck the halls for this release, as well as some other notable takes on A Christmas Carol. Lots of talk about childhood gifts and the whiff of Christmas past too.....ah, the plastics of childhood. 

So come over here you weird little man, sit down and listen to the 3 wiseass men from Boston tell it like it is on this fine evening. 

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Join us as we field a brilliant listener request to cover some of the many Christmas movies we love. It's a topic that can never be given enough consideration. We went off the cuff with this subject and gave it a glancing blow at best. We'll be revisiting some more Christmas movie talk in our next episode. There, I said it before we've recorded it, so now it must happen.

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Join us on our Christmas romp as we destroy everything in our path to bring you the goods on this 1984 box office monster that’s been largely relegated to semi-suspended animation. At least in comparison to other top box office competitors of the year.  Why is that?

Gremlins is the highest grossing film of all time to never reach number one at the domestic box office. It’s also largely responsible for the existence of the PG-13 rating system the MPAA implemented two months after its released.

This movie is de...

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Do you love going home for the holidays? Do you love key lime pie with m&m’s? If you’ve answered no to these questions and others, you’ve been baited. Join our conversation on this perennial Thanksgiving favorite. 

It’s a honey hole of dysfunction, repudiation, and ultimately, redemption. So indulge yourself, and maybe even brace your caustic, conversational munitions before casting yourself into that all too familiar family dynamic. 

We’d like to think that if you enjoy our conversations, you’d truly appreciate this movie. And it ages li...

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⚡️Minisode⚡️ Has a movie ever made you feel unwell? Queasy, nauseous, anxious? What’s your first movie/memory of it happening? Saddle up your Blorfosaurus and strap on those ear goggles, here are some of our greatest icks!

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Personal ghost stories lifted out of our Lost Boys episode. From the Winchester Mystery House to Tony's couch, that's coast to coast if you're geographically inclined.

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It’s the 35th anniversary of Trick or Treat this week! Here is another Fire Sale release from the Halloween 2020 vault. We're trying to provide you with as much content as possible this month, seeing as October is the summit of movie going.

This film follows high school student Eddie Weinbauer, after finding out his heavy metal hometown hero, and Lakeridge High alumnus Sammi Curr, has perished in a hotel fire. After getting his hands on Sammi's last and as-yet unreleased album, Songs in the key of Death (Stevie Wonder anyone?), a...

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DUNE 1984. This is a vault bonus episode! Tony and Jen guide us through the miasma of this David Lynch miscue, while Phil and Annaliesa augment the chat with enlightened deliberation. I give these kudos specifically because I sat there completely catatonic with only the occasional caustic contributions. 

We recorded this conversation on October 3, 2020. I would say we were holding it for just such an occasion, the eve of a new Dune incarnation. And one that hopefully won’t suffer the same turgid fate (my opinion) as its predecessor, as it will be...

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THEY LIVE. It's a John Carpenter machine gun party up in here! Don't underestimate the present day relevance of this 1988 action packed, sci-fi juggernaut and its socioeconomic prophesying of the rich and powerful, and their instatiable urge to control your world. Sound heavy? Cue Roddy Piper, a WWF brawler with a Merriam-Webster sized canon of one liners that made Rowdy the greatest heel wrestling would ever know. And a man posessing a screen presence like no other walk on leading man of the era. This role, and Roddy's portrayal of Nada, would wet...

THEY LIVE. It's a John Carpenter machine gun party up in here! Don't underestimate the present day relevance of this 1988 action packed, sci-fi juggernaut and its socioeconomic prophesying of the rich and powerful, and their instatiable urge to control your world. Sound heavy? Cue Roddy Piper, a WWF brawler with a Merriam-Webster sized canon of one liners that made Rowdy the greatest heel wrestling would ever know. And a man posessing a screen presence like no other walk on leading man of the era. This role, and Roddy's portrayal of Nada, would wet...